MY EXPERIENCES
My personal journey towards the light really began at the age of 19. Having left home for University, I found that learning to cope with stress and events as an ‘adult' proved to be very difficult. The biggest problem I faced was the uncertainty surrounding what was ‘wrong'. All I knew was that I was full of raging anger and despair but could not find an immediate cause. As my life began to spiral down and depression overwhelmed me, I felt lost within the darkness. The only saving grace was that I knew, at some level, there had to be a reason for the darkness and more so, a way to get out of it. Once I accepted that I didn't want to live in the dark, the path of light began to open up.
Everyone will experience the beginning of the light differently. For me opening up to the light was surprisingly difficult to accept. Although I knew without a doubt that God was present and that life was meant to be happy- I still had trouble accepting this as a truth for myself. Because the path to awakening is based on changing one's perspective, experiencing the actual changes can be scary and confusing. I was asking myself to face issues, fears, and often negative memories head on with total and complete honesty. This meant that I had to acknowledge, accept, take responsibility for, and integrate all of the events of my life in order to release the pains and blocks holding me back. I had to stop living life subconsciously and begin to actively live consciously- completely AWARE and RESPONSIBLE for ALL of my THOUGHTS and ACTIONS- how they were affecting me and others around me.
When I made the final commitment to better my own life the universe responded immediately. I began stumbling upon books and movies (see tab) that resonated with everything I was going through. I began to meet a variety of teachers (add or make a special thank you) that came into my life at crucial points to bring me love, lessons, and healings. Without them I know that I would not be where I am today. As I began to return to my true self, I gained the power to address the pains and hurts in my life, forgive the people that caused them, and truly heal and let go of the residual emotions holding me back. As I began to clear my own heart I also began to clear away the confusion blocking my inner sight. Initially as I let go more and more blocks I began to feel very empty. I experienced moments void of any emotions or blocks and at times found this uncomfortable. But soon enough the extra space within myself began to fill with love and acceptance. I began to see the truth of all of life and was comforted in the warmth of my true self. For the first time I was learning what it felt like to be at total peace.
Now to be honest, the first few years were rocky- it was difficult to stay connected to the light and often life seemed like an emotional rollercoaster. The difference now was that I had tasted peace and whenever I dropped into darkness I could remember the warmth of the light and pull myself back up. With great discipline I fought against my ego and the darkness and overtime being in the light simply became the habit of my life. This is not to say that I never experience darkness or anger or despair, it's just that now when I do experience negative situations, I can allow them to flow through, learn the needed lesson, and let them go without holding on to negative emotions. I can quickly return to a state of peace by taking the time to reconnect with my higher self. And it is with great gratitude to God, the Angels, and the Universe that I was able to stay the course and find out Who I Truly Am. I feel even more fortunate that I can now bring forth my own experiences and learning to help others find out Who They Truly Are so that they too can experience peace in their own lives.
